Routines

Routine--for better and for worse.  Routine can be good.  It allows you to rely on the tried and true.  It is safe and comfortable.  But it can be humdrum and boring and has a very bad effect on motivation.  So how do you keep a balance?  While it would be nice to come up with creative and interesting recipes everyday (and have the energy to cook them), who really has the time?  Yet I know that when I plan ahead I do well, and of course I am happy with the results.

So here is a good question...why, when I know something is good for me, do I do the opposite?  If I cook well, I eat well and reach my goals.  If I go to exercise regularly, only good comes from it.  So why do I consciously or subconsciously fight myself on these things?  Why do I knowingly sabotage myself? Have I not been down this road long enough times to have learned my lesson?  How do I motivate myself to prioritize the things that will benefit me?

This does not mean that I have fallen off the wagon.  Actually I am making nice progress.  I have lost 8 kilos since starting this journey almost 8 weeks ago (down 11 kilos from my all time high--which actually was an all time low!).  I have successfully refrained from eating all dairy products and diet soda is a fading memory.  I even have been able to stop taking cholesterol medication.  But I am in some kind of rut, not doing what I really need to do with the type of commitment really needed to do it.  I just feel that it is still such a struggle and I so badly want it not to be that way.

So goals for this week...PLAN AHEAD.  Plan to succeed. Plan to prioritize me. Plan to be positive. To change habits, it has to feel a bit forced at the beginning.  Somewhere along the way, the forced habit starts to become second nature--the good aspect of routine. 

Choice is not liberating!!

This is my first insight for this week.  Usually one would think that having choices gives us more freedom and that would be liberating.  To have more control to decide what to do, what to eat, what to buy, etc.  I remember once going with Seth to a huge housewares store in New York.  We needed to buy a spatula that could be used with a teflon pan.  How difficult could that be?  Well, this store had no less than 20 variations of said spatulas.  We stood dumbstruck for a while, I got a stomach ache, and eventually we just grabbed something and left.  Had there been only 3 varieties of spatulas then the choice would have been so much easier.  Sometimes less is more.

Sadly, food poses the same challenges for me as did that spatula so many years ago.  As soon as I am given choice in my diet options I start to lose control.  The freedom is frightening, not liberating.  As long as my list of foods was limited, I stuck to the plan 100%.  True, last week I was fantasizing about having some fish (which I did, and it was yummy), part of me longs for "stage 1" and all of the restrictions that go along with it.

However, that is not realistic for the long term.  So I need to learn to deal with the freedom.  Choice doesn't have to mean anarchy.  It can mean good choices within the rules of the system. (OMG, I sound like I go to the Democratic school!!!).  In a way, I am learning to be a responsible citizen in the world of food choices. 

I had some challenges this week--mostly around amounts and portion size.  I have not been tempted by sugar and sweets of which there are plently wherever you go.  I have indulged in coffee, but significantly less than before.  While I have refrained from all diet sodas, I have been spotted stalking total strangers who are carrying a bottle of diet coke in their hands.

Exercise!!! Wish I was doing more.  Here are 2 photos to prove that I do work out.  One machine works on the quadriceps (legs), and the other on the pecs and deltoids (arms/shoulder).  The one for the shoulder has helped me with my bursitis:  my range is better and I have less pain.  I hate to admit it, but exercise works.

(Not the most flattering photos, but still better than 7 kilos ago!)